The Battle of Mom Shaming

photo courtesy of Brandie Scales

Oh friends, this post has taken me a long time to write. I've sat down to try to write it multiple times and always stop for some reason or another. Sometimes it feels like a rant, sometimes I just can't convey how I really feel. Regardless though, it's something I've wanted to discuss with all of you for a long time now. Before I start though I want to say one thing, in no way shape or form will any negativity, shaming, or pure meanness be tolerated in this discussion. All comments must be approved before they are published on this blog. So if you have nothing nice to say then please don't even bother. Same goes for all social media and e-mail. You will promptly be removed from this discussion and any future Tiny Talks. Thank you!

Mom shaming is a real thing. It's awful and truly sad that it happens. Before I became a mom, I know I would judge. Heck from time to time I still do, but since becoming a mom I will never ever vocalize it because I know how much it hurts. As a mom, we're all just doing our best but many times it's not seen that way. It saddens me when someone tells a mom that they're not doing it right because they may do things differently than someone else. This is the number one factor of where I see mom shaming come in to play. We all have different styles of raising our babies and to me that's the awesome thing about parenthood. I 100% understand about being passionate about something, for me, those things tend to be baby wearing, breastfeeding, Babywise, and vaccinations. If you want my personal views on these topics then let's chat on the side, but I mention them because I fully appreciate the differences of opinions surrounding these topics. Just because some mamas are on the complete opposite end of the spectrum of where I am on these things doesn't mean they're bad moms in my opinion. I know for a fact they believe what they believe and do what they do out of the goodness of their hearts for their children, and for that I applaud them. I wish so many others felt the same though. Why is it that we feel the need to be mean and degrade each other for a difference of opinion?

The hardest part about mom shaming is that it sticks with you, at least it does with me. I have very distinct memories of other women making me feel incredibly inferior for things such as Babywise and breastfeeding. It was to the point one time where I actually questioned if I was a good mom? I'm sure some of you have been to that point, too in your motherhood journey. Isn't it the absolute worst feeling? You go from sad to mad. I've gotten so heated over these shaming incidents, it's crazy how much time and energy is wasted on it. The worst part about it too is that it's so hard to just shake it off. I define myself as a mom and to be basically told I'm bad at it just shakes me to my core. But in the end, who cares what that person thinks, right? We just have to look at our babies to see the proof of how amazing we are at this motherhood thing.

So the next time you run in to an incident that breaks your heart, go snuggle your heart on the outside and remember you're the perfect mom. I am so proud to be a part of this tribe and thank you all so much for being a part of it with me. Every single one of you are the best mom ever and don't ever let anyone else tell you otherwise.

Let's all band together here and help bring awareness and stop the shame! A few things I personally like to do on the daily to bring positivity to this mama tribe is:

1. Remind all mamas that they are simply the best. You're all my heroes, seriously.
2. When I get a negative comment or a dirty look I take a deep breath, say God Bless, and move on. I look a Kai, soak in that smile and remember I'm the best mama ever to that little baby boy.
3. Join mom Facebook groups like Lemon Stripes Mamas, Babywise Mamas, Wildbird VIPeeps, Birds of a Feather, The Everymom, or my very own FB group The Tiny Tribe!

Join in on this weeks Tiny Talk on Instagram Live tomorrow night (11/6) at 7PM CST! I can't wait to chat more about this with all of you tomorrow night!